The Mother of all Holidays

     On Sunday we celebrate the 102nd anniversary of Mother’s Day.  As history tells it President Woodrow Wilson signed Mother’s Day into a national holiday in 1914, designating the second Sunday of each May to recognize and honor Mothers.
     By my math, Mother’s Day will turn roughly 37, 230.  I’ve long believed that every day is Mother’s Day and should be celebrated as such.  How to do that is up to interpretation.  Anna Jarvis, a West Virginia woman who led the charge to create Mother’s Day, was apparently not happy with the commercialization of the holiday.  Hallmark Cards jumped on this in the early 1920’s.  That may have upset Anna Jarvis, but made millions of kids and husbands ecstatic, especially around the second Saturday in May when they realized they had forgotten to get something.

     There really are no right or wrong ways to express feelings on Mother’s Day.  Madison Avenue may try to shame people into going overboard, but what's behind the gesture or gift matters the most.  I think honoring and loving your Mother the other 364 days of the year can make a simple “Happy Mother’s Day, thanks for all you do" a beautiful gift.
     Imagine this, Mothers being Mothers…only on Mother’s Day.  “Son, just throw it in with the other laundry and I’ll get to it on May 8th.”  “You kids have 257 more days to figure out what you want for dinner and I’ll cook it that night.”  Being a Mother never stops. Mothers don’t get sick days at home.  Mothers don’t get family vacations.  Mothers get their joy from making sure the family enjoyed its vacation (and perhaps from wine, but that’s another story).
     Not to undervalue flowers, brunch or a spa day, but nothing makes a Mother happier than being proud of her children.  We’ve all heard Mothers brag.  Giving them that opportunity is the best gift.
     Everything in life these days seems to move at a warp speed pace.  We suddenly slam the brakes around certain days, cram the day full of gifts, and then hit the accelerator again.  I’m not harking back to “the good ol’ days”, but suggesting we try a little harder to be aware of the people around us and appreciate them more often.

     I lost my Mother three years ago.  I think I was a good son.  Her version of me got better as I grew and matured.  In her final years she would recall how much of an angel I was as a boy.  I know this not to be true, but she wouldn’t budge.  That led me to wonder if I ever truly showed her how much I cared for her as a child, as a teenager.  I imagine most Mothers know their children love them and that they’ll likely recognize that as they grow, but it never hurts to say it, to hear it.  Like most things in life we take Mothers for granted because they’re always there.  Do we really stop to take the time and think of the sacrifices they make?  They will say they do everything out of love, that it’s not a sacrifice, but despite their superhero powers Mothers are human too.  They feel pain and joy just like the rest of us.
     I was adopted as an infant.  As I entered my mid-20s, my Mother asked me a few times if I’d like to find my birth Mother or at least find out about her.  My answer was always a swift, definitive and reassuring, “No.”  I never said that for her sake, but mine.  I speak only for my situation, but the woman who chose me, who fed me, who clothed me, who comforted me, who sacrificed her life for me…that’s my Mother.  I mean that as no disrespect to the woman who gave birth to me.  Not knowing those circumstances I give that person the benefit of the doubt, but you earn the title of Mother.  And besides, I ended up with a great one.  We never had much growing up, but never lacked anything.  She was always there for me despite how her day was going.  I even think my memories of being whipped with a switch are fond ones now.
     With kids of my own I am keenly aware of how they treat their Mother.  They have their moments, good and bad, but know the day better begin and end by showing respect and love.  It’s the very least they can do for an incredible woman who has earned the title Mother.
     The late Theodore Hesburgh, a past president at Notre Dame, once said, "The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.”  That’s a requirement I love fulfilling 365 days a year. 
     Now, where did I put that gift card to the wine store?